MARIGNY IS HERE!

MARIGNY ADELINE BREAUX

DOB: May 31, 2012

WEIGHT: 6 lbs 7 oz

LENGTH: 18 inches

Marigny is now three days old and she has been such a pleasant, perfect little baby.  However, the journey to get her here was not as sweet.  My entire pregnancy has been much different than my previous ones so I'm not sure why I was so surprised the delivery would be completely different as well.  The days leading up to it were very confusing.  I would have hours of contractions and then they would just stop.  I was beginning to feel like I would never know when I was in true, active labor. 

During the night of May 29th/early morning of May 30th, I was having intense contractions the entire night.  I was just waiting for them to form a pattern before I felt for sure that it was time.  Joshua even stayed home from work the morning of the 30th because I really felt we would be going in to the hospital before early afternoon.  However, just as they had ten days before, the contractions gradually began to fade off.  So I asked Joshua to take a walk with me around the neighborhood "to make Marigny come out".  Well, when Beckham heard this, he insisted on coming along because he really wanted to see Marigny come out...lol.  The three of us walked all around the neighborhood when tired Beckham finally said, "Mommy, how about we just wait for Marigny to come out?".  Surprisingly, the walk made the contractions stop!  I was bummed and Joshua had to go back to work. 

Throughout that day, I continued to get some pretty strong contractions but they were totally random.  Still, I knew I must be getting close because the contractions were getting increasingly more painful, and I was never going longer than 45-60 minutes without one.  By six o'clock that evening, the contraction were much closer together, about 10 minutes apart, and were becoming unbearable, meaning that I could no longer talk through them.  By eight o'clock, I felt very strongly that this was the night.  The contractions were 5-8 minutes apart and were killing me.  I decided to go into the hospital even though they were not under five minutes apart yet because I feared that things would start moving quickly since the pain was so bad. 

We were checked into the hospital at 9:30pm, and I was 3cm dilated.  I was told by the nurse that she would monitor me for an hour and if there was no change I would be sent home.  She suggested I walk so Joshua and I walked in a tiny circle around the tiny hallway for an hour.  This hospital is so small that there is only a handful of rooms in Labor and Delivery, and there were only two nurses working while we were there.  Also, the anesthesiologist is only on call and does not stay at the hospital, and which I learned later that night, lives 30 minutes away! 

During our 60 min walk, I had to stop about every five minutes to grab the rails on the wall and freeze up in pain.  I even had moments where I broke down in tears because at this point I knew I was in labor and I knew that an hour would not be long enough to see a change in my cervix.  After all, I had been having contractions all night and day, and was still only 3cm!  I was so scared that they would send me home and I would have no clue when to go back.  I mean, if that wasn't labor then what the hell was?! 

So at 11pm, my nurse checked me after my walk, and as I expected, I was still 3cm.  She called my doctor who said that I could stay for one more hour, and if there were still no change to send me home.  By midnight, I was in excruciating pain and I had made up my mind that if they tried to send me home, I would hang out in the lobby until they couldn't deny that a baby was coming out of me.  The nurse checked my cervix then and was happy to see that I had dilated to 4cm!  She told me then that they would definitely be keeping me and asked if I would like an epidural.  I told her absolutely and asked that I get it as soon as possible.  I was extremely upset when she then explained that she would have to get the results back from my lab work first (which she still had to do) and that it would take about an hour, and then she could call the anesthesiologist who lived thirty minutes away.  My eyes widened and I wanted to scream!  An hour of lab work + 30 minutes for the anesthesiologist to get there + 30 minutes for him to set everything up = 2 hours of PAIN!  I felt like I couldn't make it through one more contraction and I was going to have to go through at least two more hours of them!  I already felt like I was in a nightmare, but little did I know that it was just the beginning.

An hour later at 1:30am, my water broke in the middle of a contraction as I turned to grab the bed rail with both hands.  I yelled in shock because I had never experienced that so unexpectedly before.  My doctor had to break my water for both of my other deliveries.  I got up to go to the bathroom to pee and get cleaned up when my contractions went out of control, nothing I had ever experienced before.  Joshua was standing over me while I was sitting on the toilet, and I was holding on to him so tight screaming in pain.  As soon as I stood up to walk back to the bed, another contraction began, and I grabbed a hold of the sink and almost ended up on all four in the middle of the bathroom because I couldn't bear to stand.  Someone I managed to make it back to the bed during the seconds between contractions.  By the time I was back laying down it was 1:50am, only twenty minutes after my water broke.  I was screaming through each contraction.  My nurse began getting worried and asked if I was feeling the urge to push, and I told her that I thought so but I wasn't sure because I couldn't get past the pain.  She immediately checked me, and I watched her eyes widen and her jaw drop.  "You have no more cervix." she said.  "The baby's head is right there.  Don't push!  I'm going call the doctor!".  I was grabbing Joshua who was standing next to me rubbing my face and trying to calm me as I realized there was no way I was getting epidural now.  I couldn't believe it.  I was in total shock.  Never did I think I would be one of those women that this happened to.  I kept yelling, "I can't do it!" and "Help me!"  over and over.  Poor Joshie kept saying that he felt helpless, but really, his calming words and stroking did make me feel better in between contractions. 

My doctor who lived five minutes away arrived right away.  Before she had gotten there, I asked the nurse for any kind of meds she could give me to help me make it through this.  And once the doctor was in the room, the nurse asked if I had received the meds from the other nurse.  When I told her that I did not, she began to walk off to get it when my doctor stopped her and said, "There's no time.  She has to push now."  Another stab to my heart!  How the hell was I going to make it through this with ABSOLUTELY NO DRUGS?!  Again and again, I just kept yelling, "I can't do this!" and "Help!" or "Help me!".  I remember looking in my doctor's eyes as she remained completely calm and told me, "You can do this, Stacey.  You will probably feel better when you push."  But I was still in shock.  I kept saying, "I can't believe this.  I can't believe this.  How is this happening?". 

They wanted me to hold up my legs but I couldn't.  The pain was seriously more than I could bare.  I was took busy holding on to the bed rails and swinging my head back and forth in pain, so the nurse took one leg and Joshua took the other.  In between the contractions, I would open my eyes and steady them into my doctor's as she would insist that I could do it and that I needed to focus or it wouldn't work.  I knew she right, and there was no turning back.  I had no choice but to push this human being out of me.  And I tried.  I really tried, but it wasn't working.  I was still freaking out and I could feel that when I was trying to push, I really wasn't.  I was kind of hyperventilating and my nurse started feeding me ice and gave me a gas mask.  I was still repeating all the same words, and trying to find the strength to make it through this.  I remember saying, "I know that I'm freaking out right now, but I'm really trying!".  I also remember saying that it didn't feel natural at all.  Whenever I felt a contractions, I just wanted to tense up and straighten my legs which is total opposite of what you're supposed to do.

Finally, after attempting to push several times with no luck, I figured it out.  It did feel better when I pushed... just instead of feeling pain, it feels like you're pooping.  Well, it feels better until the baby's head starts coming out.  Then it feels like fire.  And you have to push through it.  Finally, you feel the head plop out and you think you can stop, but no.  Everyone yells, "You got it!  Keep pushing!" so you only have a second to catch your breath and you begin pushing again.  Then the incredible burn and you feel the shoulders plop through, and you really think it's done.  But no.  They continue to yell, "Keep pushing!  This is it!" and then you feel the rest of the body slide out.  At 2:24am, my baby girl was born.  I saw her as the doctor raised her to me, but the pain and shock were too much for me to focus on her.  I really began hyperventilating and had to struggle to get my breathing under control after that last push.  After the pain of the placenta and everything else the doctor was doing down there, I finally got to rest my eyes on Marigny who laid in the bed across from me.  I watched Joshua stand over her and talk to her, and she went from crying to silent when she heard his voice.  Then I was interrupted by more pain.  Wow, the epidural really does save you from so much pain.  I began burning so bad down there that I couldn't even focus on the baby anymore.  It took a little while for them to get me pain meds because they had so much work to do.  After what felt like forever, the pain down there began to subside but the cramping then began.  It felt like I was in labor again.  The cramps from my uterus were so bad that I was back to gripping the bed rails.  It was time to feed Marigny, but I was in way too much pain to even hold her.  People have told me that after you push the baby out, you suddenly don't feel anymore pain.  Well, I can promise you that that is not true. 

I watched Joshua feed her across the room from me; and after quite a while, I was able to hold her.  She was so precious.  It's amazing how much you can love someone right away.  It's the true feeling of love at first sight.  It does indeed exist. 

Our stay at the hospital wasn't bad.  Marigny was angel the first night as most babies usually are.  I just loved watching her, and I was so happy each time it was time to feed her.  Joshua had to go into work that day so I was alone with her a lot of the time.  My friend, Felecia came to visit and then not long after she left, Joshua returned with Donna and the boys.  The boys were so excited to see her.  Everett just couldn't get over her and Beckham just wanted to hold her the whole time.  I got have all three of my children together for the first time. 

Here's a video of the boys meeting Marigny for the first time!

The next morning, my doctor, Dr. Theresa Stigen came by to check on me.  She really was amazing during the delivery.  She remained calm and helped me to focus amongst the chaos when I needed to, and I'm not sure I could have made it through without her.  I am so very happy I ended up switching doctors in the middle of my pregnancy. 

The following day, Joshua had to go back to work so I spent the whole day alone at the hospital with Marigny.  I took a lot of pictures while we were there, and I didn't do anything but care for her, stare at her and sleep.  When it was time to leave, I dressed her in her "going home" dress, and she looked like a sweet baby doll.  She stared at Joshua the whole time he put her in her car seat, and the nurses all wanted to see her and say goodbye when we left. 

She was passed out in her car seat when we got home, so we left her in the seat until she was ready to wake up.  Well she stayed in there forever!  I ended up going take a nap, and Joshua said he ended up having to just wake her up and take her out of the seat.  When I came downstairs after my nap, I found them sleeping together on the couch.

That night, she kept me up all night!  She wanted to eat every hour; and in between her feedings, she would keep dropping her binky and fuss.  Around 3am, Joshua got the bright idea to put her in her car seat since she loved it so much ,and it worked.  She slept like an angel after that.  She went three to four hours between feedings and never fussed when she dropped her binky.  Joshua and I also traded places at this time.  I was in so much pain that I could barely move anymore, and I also broke out in hives everywhere (I always break out in hives after I give birth).  So I was drugged up on vicotin, motrin and benadryl. 

Here are some pictures of Marigny's first full day at home!

Her second night at home was better because Joshua put her in the car seat right away.  I don't want her to get in the habit of that, but I didn't mind because by the time we were going to bed, I knew I would be hurting too much to care for her.  Joshua immediately took the side of the bed closest to her (my side), and fed her throughout the night.  My milk came in so now I was in pain from the milk, the cramps and the hives.  I am not breastfeeding so there is nothing I can do to relieve the pain in my breasts.  They have hardened and quadrupled in size, and they burn like hell.  The cramps last night were actually the worst that I've had since I've been home.  I ended up having to take two vicotin, motrin and benadryl last night.  I may not be feeding the baby all night, but I'm surely not getting any sleep.  I'm really hoping for a better night tonight because Joshua has work in the morning and will need his rest.  I just can't wait until he is done with Sergeant's Course and can take his paternity leave.  Just another week.  :)